Sunday, 27 April 2008

Chemo 6 - End of Primary Treatment

Started the last "official" Chemo cycle yesterday. So by Wednesday I have completed the state of the art primary treatment for a GBM tumour. So what next? Apparently, we wait and see.

In around 4 weeks time I'll go in for my next MRI scan and if not much has changed I'll be put on hold for 3 months. And what are we actually waiting for? For me to start feeling more external symptoms of the tumour, for my hazelnut size tumour to go to walnut size, for a new pea or two to appear. If I am lucky things will be the same as the last MRI. What we are not expecting is a complete recovery.

After all these months of being opened up, radiated and poisoned for the sake of this hazelnut it seems kind of odd to just stop especially when you see that the treatments have had some kind of visible effect. Why not just blast it to hell? but that's not the way it works with Cancer is it. Is this the lull before the storm.

Over the last few weeks I have noticed that my right foot doesn't lift as high as I want it to thus causing me to trip up steps more often than I used to, and while doing some gardening today I had to put in considerable effort to remain standing when my right foot involuntarily rolled sideways. Add to that my writing problems and an increased problem with finding words when I want them and you can see who is winning the battle at the moment regardless of how much improved the inside of my head looked at the end of February.

It is going to be very difficult just sitting and waiting.

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